Advice Seeking as Networking
How asking for advice can lead to real connections—and job opportunities.
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There’s a job search strategy that doesn’t feel like networking—but absolutely is.
It’s not “networking events” or cold DMing strangers. It’s seeking advice.
Asking someone for their thoughts on your transition, experience, or job search focus can be the beginning of a meaningful professional connection.
Where companies that you’re targeting are concerned, reaching out to current employees to “pick their brains” about what it’s like to work there can be a potent strategy for engagement.
Done right, advice-seeking can be one of the most organic and low-pressure ways to build new relationships.
🧠 Why It Works
When you ask someone for advice, it does three things:
✅ It affirms their expertise
✅ It gives them a low-risk, low lift way to help you (no referrals, no pressure). Remember: most people like to be helpful or feel generous
✅ It opens the door for ongoing connection
💬 What It Looks Like
It doesn’t have to be formal or awkward. In fact, it shouldn’t be.
Here are some ways to ask:
“I’m shifting out of federal service and looking at the nonprofit space. Could I pick your brain about your experiences working in that sector?”
“You’ve worked across agencies and in the private sector—I’d love to hear how you think about translating experience across those settings/what that transition was like for you.”
“I’m interested in a role at [X employer] and I’d like to learn more about what it’s like to work there. Can I have a few minutes of your time to chat about what it’s been like for you?”
🤝 Make It Easy to Say Yes
Suggest a short time window (10–15 minutes).
Make the logistics easy for them—suggest Zoom (on a link you provide) or a phone call. It’s better to direct them to a live conversation. However, if you must, you can suggest corresponding via email or LinkedIn message (but don’t offer that up front).
Offer something specific like 2–3 blocks of time within the next week. You can then add flexibility with language like, “…or another time that works for you in the next couple weeks.”
Caution: Do NOT make this about selling yourself in any way. You’re not front loading with a request to refer you. At this stage, you’re looking to build a relationship.
Bottom line: keep it light. You’re not asking them to open a door for you—you’re just asking them to talk to you about their own experience and perspective.
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🔄 The Multiplier Effect
If the conversation goes well, ask:
“Do you know 1-2 colleagues that you’d suggest I talk to?”
You always want to use specific numbers when asking anyone for anything, but this often turns one conversation into two—or ten.
🎯 When Advice Turns Into a Referral
Sometimes, the person you’re asking for advice ends up referring you to someone—or something—before the conversation even ends.
But here’s the key: you can’t lead with that expectation. Your request to have a conversation with this person has to stay what it is—an honest request for perspective.
When people feel comfortable and unpressured, they’re more likely to say something like:
“Actually, I know someone hiring for a role like that. Want me to connect you?”
Or, if you’re near the end of the conversation and you already have an open job listing in mind, you might ask:
“This has been so helpful and I’m beginning to get excited about this role I found online. Would you be willing to put in a good word for me?”
That kind of moment doesn’t come from pushing. It comes from having the kind of thoughtful, easy conversation that makes them want to help more.
There may be a literal bonus available to both of you: most employers offer referral bonuses to their employees. In other words, you might both profit from that referral.
TL;DR
Advice seeking is networking.
It’s easier, more effective, and more human than most job seekers realize.
👉 Try it once this week. You might be surprised how ready people are to say yes.
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